Introduction

This is one of the most quoted sayings of the Civil Rights icon, the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.:

“I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”

He delivered his famous “I Have a Dream” speech on August 28, 1963, during the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom. In the years since he shared that dream, there has been some movement toward eliminating bigotry, prejudice, and racism. Certainly, much more progress is needed. At the same time, there is much room for improvement in parenting that produces children who become adults with good character.

Strong fathers want their children to grow up and be judged as people of strong character, regardless of the color of their skin. This blog post offers some keys to raising high-character kids. We start by laying out a profile of a quality character.

What is High Character?

People with strong character typically exhibit a range of positive qualities, including:

• Integrity:
  • Honesty and truthfulness in all situations.
  • Acting with ethical principles and maintaining high moral standards.
  • Being trustworthy and reliable.
• Responsibility:
  • Taking ownership of their actions and their impact on others.
  • Being accountable for their words and deeds.
  • Fulfilling their obligations and commitments.
• Respect:
  • Valuing and honoring others, regardless of their background or differences.
  • Showing consideration and kindness towards others.
  • Listening attentively and communicating effectively.
• Compassion:
  • Showing empathy and concern for the well-being of others.
  • Being willing to help those in need.
  • Demonstrating kindness and generosity.
• Perseverance:
  • Pushing through challenges and obstacles.
  • Staying determined in the face of setbacks.
  • Showing resilience and the ability to learn from failures.
• Courage:
  • Standing up for what is right, even when it’s difficult.
  • Facing fears and taking risks.
  • Overcoming challenges and adversity.
• Humility:
  • Recognizing and acknowledging their own strengths and weaknesses.
  • Being open to learning and growth.
  • Avoiding arrogance and self-importance.
• Self-Discipline:
  • Controlling their impulses and resisting temptations.
  • Setting and achieving goals.
  • Managing their time and resources effectively.

This is not an exhaustive list, but it highlights some key characteristics that define individuals with strong character. These qualities contribute to positive relationships, personal growth, and a fulfilling life.

Some Keys to Raising Kids with Strong Character Traits

Raising kids with quality characters is a journey, not a destination. It requires great commitment and intentionality over a long period of time, but it is an investment in your children that is more than worth the effort.

Here are some strategies:

• Lead by Example: Children learn by watching. Show them what it means to be kind, honest, responsible, and respectful.
• Emphasize Values: Talk openly with them about the values of honesty, compassion, fairness, and perseverance. Incorporate these values into everyday conversations and family rules.
• Foster Empathy: Encourage children to understand and share the feelings of others. Volunteer together, read stories about diverse people and cultures, and discuss current events.
• Set Clear Expectations: Establish clear rules and consequences. Be consistent and follow through with them.
• Encourage Responsibility: Give children age-appropriate chores and responsibilities. Let them experience the natural consequences of their choices.
• Teach Problem-Solving: Help children develop the skills to navigate challenges and resolve conflicts peacefully.
• Embrace Mistakes: Mistakes are learning opportunities. Help children understand that everyone makes mistakes and that learning from them is okay.
• Celebrate Progress: Acknowledge and praise your children’s efforts and accomplishments, both big and small.
• Provide a Safe and Loving Environment: A secure and loving home is essential for children’s emotional and social development.

Some Final Thoughts:

• Be persistent: Be committed and consistent in leading your child to grow in character as you set the example.
• Be patient: Love your child enough to be long-suffering with him. Longsuffering is patience over a long period of time under challenging circumstances without complaining.  

Inspiration from the Holy Scriptures

^{Love is patient, love is kind…  – 1 Corinthians 13:4 NIV}

Patience is an attribute of agape, the highest form of love. It is love from God and love for God. It is patient, selfless, unconditional, compassionate, and sacrificial. Strong fathers choose to give their children this love as they model high-character living.

About the Author

Eli Williams is a father, grandfather, and mentor to several men. He and his wife Judy have served in community outreach ministry since the late 1980s and founded Urban Light Ministries in 1995. Eli has been a professional fatherhood practitioner since 2006 and is an ordained Christian minister helping to pastor New Hope Church in Springfield, Ohio. Reverend Williams authored Father Love—The Powerful Resource Every Child Needs in 2016 and led ULM in the creation of Fathering Strong.

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